I recently had lunch with a colleague – let’s call him Bob, and couldn’t help but to make some general observations – not being judgmental, simply the blatant obvious: Bob has become fat, dumb & happy – and I’d submit by choice!  You see, Bob came up with an interesting idea in the mid 80s and became very engaged in consulting with global companies of varying sizes and industries.  For the past two decades Bob has milked every possible angle you can imagine on this simple (and at its height, unique and powerful) idea.

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Amazing how often we need to be reminded much more so than taught!  I found Dale Carnegie’s book on my bookshelf – this one from 1936.  Which advice here wouldn’t be an asset to your efforts today?

Best,

David

How to Win Friends and Influence People

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Six ways to make people like you

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
6. Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

Win people to your way of thinking

1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

A leader’s job often includes changing your people’s attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:

1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

As a mentor of mine often says, “If you’re not tooting your own horn there is no music!” Those whose livelihoods depend on externally focused relationships such as business development professionals, all understand the power of reference selling.  In any economy there is an enormous level of comfort in a buyer’s journey when they get unsolicited recommendations from other satisfied buyers – it’s simply called “credibility by association.”

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When you’re a candidate for a promotion that ends up going to a peer, are you left wondering “why them and not me?”  Why were they promoted to manage or lead a broader realm of responsibilities, but not me? Why when I am the one who is more consistently and more recently invited to spend time with the boss, are they the one receiving the promotion?

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This is from Tim Fulton’s always interesting Small Business Matters newsletter:

• Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers are now Fairwell Honeychild
• Polygram Records, Warner Brothers and Keebler are now Poly-Warner-Cracker
• 3M and Goodyear are now mmmGood
• John Deere and Abitibi-Price are now Deere Abi
• Honeywell, Imasco, and Home Oil are now Honey, I’m Home
• Denison Mines, Alliance, and Metal Mining are now Mine, All Mine
• Knott’s Berry Farm and National Organization of Women are now Knott NOW!
• Zippo Manufacturing, Audi, Dofasco, Dakota Mining are now Zip Audi Do-Da

From David Ryback, PhD - EQ Associates, regarding the recent National Speakers Association (NSA) - Georgia Chapter FastTrack 2.0 program we wrapped up over a six (6) week period:

Sent: Tuesday, December 09, 2008 10:56 PM
Subject: Re: NSA GA FastTrack – Final Thoughts…

 

David,

Your class was excellent!  You have proved yourself a master of speaking professionalism.  You shared your path to success in a completely authentic manner, while giving participants the opportunity to question, comment and laugh together.  I’m so highly impressed with you and your style.  In my opinion, you are the master teacher of speaking worldwide.  I can think of no other individual who can share so powerfully about the speaking profession and the skills needed to nurture to get to the top.

Where you can inject an infectious passion, energy and knowledge to make a real difference in the lives of others?